Knives.  How is it possible that an instrument deemed as a weapon can bring about such arousal for me especially since I have been on the rather unpleasant receiving end of such a tool? Many years ago I worked with individuals who were extremely dangerous, who used guns, knives, 2X4′s and pretty much any object they could to inflict pain, to control a situation, to control me and although it has taken some time to move past those unpleasant experiences I am now at a place where I am taking the power back and not allowing my previous experiences to dictate what I like, what I find arousing.

Knife play has been a topic of conversation I have been having with myself for many, many years, 18 in fact and although I have experienced unnecessary evils with regards to a knife, I am now at a place where I feel safe enough with Master for us to explore such a device.  I feel so safe in fact that I actually have no fear when I think of Master holding a knife to my throat or running the tip of the blade over my skin; all I feel is excitement and the cool sensation of the blade leaving me in goosebumps of pleasure.

Interestingly, my lack of fear towards Master and the knife appears to leave Master with a less of a desire to use it on me for he can not grasp how I can feel any excitement if I experience no fear. In Master’s mind, the idea of knife play is just that: fear. Fear of actually being cut, fear of Master not keeping his word and slicing my flesh, fear, fear, fear.  I can understand how my desire can be confusing to Master; however, the reality is I trust Master. I trust Master completely. I have no doubts that Master will always ensure I am safe, that I am void of harm and destruction, both physically and psychologically and as long as Master has full control over a situation I know I do not have to worry about anything.  This does not mean that Master might not cut me, he just might. Granted he has expressed to me numerous times that cutting and blood do not excite him; however, I know that people change all the time and one day as I am spread eagle, naked, my flesh stark and white, he might be inclined to cut my flesh and although at this particular moment I am uncomfortable with such an imagine, I trust that Master would know what he is doing and understand his actions and take my mental well being into consideration.

The level of trust I have towards Master has taken four years to build; however, after spending all that time together, after sharing all my insecurities, my doubts, my uncertainties I have nothing left to hide, nothing left to be ashamed of and nothing to fear. Including Master with a knife.

I would never have brought the idea of knives to the surface had I not taken a great deal of time within myself to think about how I feel about knives, about the idea that I might get cut, that Master might want something I do not necessarily want myself and at the end of those many conversations I have come to learn that I am ready to break from my mental restraints and embrace what once created a tremendous amount of arousal and excitement deep within.

My first thoughts when I think of Master using the new knife he purchased is of Master lightly scraping wax from my back and perhaps my nipples or even my cunt lips. I think of the contrast of the blade, perhaps he has kept it in the freezer, against my heated flesh from all that wax. I think of not being permitted to move or the threat of cutting myself should I move. I think of the blade being pushed into my flesh hard enough to pinch yet not hard enough to cut the skin.

Just like electricity I think it is important to understand and note that knives are not toys, they are tools and or weapons therefore it is important to treat any knife play with a level of seriousness for no one wants an accidental stabbing. Accidents happen, people slip, mistakes are made; however, the error that could be made with a knife could be life altering therefore all precautions should be taken prior to bringing out a knife.

Master has yet to use the new knife on me; however I have patience and I do not believe everything needs to be used immediately. When the time is right I will experience it and until then I can continue enjoying all those fantasies in my mind.

~His