My service to Master.

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Last night as I knelt on the floor before Master, placing a combination of nanaimo bar and whipping cream into Masters' mouth, I could not help but smile. Sensing something was lingering behind my bright grin, Master asked what I was thinking.

"Well Master. I can not help but wonder what some of your co-workers would think if they knew that you have a slave at home. A woman who tends to your every need from ensuring your home is clean, your laundry is complete, your meals are all made, your dishes are are all washed; I mean I even bring you your dinner and I take your dishes to the kitchen when you are done. In fact, I do things before you even ask such as refilling your beverage, prepare a sandwich for you when you get the munchies in the late evening as well as bringing you a clean t-shirt or a pair of comfortable trousers to change into because I know you will want to remove the ones you have on. In fact when you think about it, there really isn't anything I do not do. Unless of course you tell me otherwise. I mean, even now, here I am kneeling beside you, feeding you your dessert. And just think, earlier this evening, you easily molested me, taking whatever you want knowing full well that not only would I not stop you but that I love knowing you can use me sexually anyway, anytime, anywhere. And on top of all that, I am even willing to explore another woman with you. How many of your co-workers would even believe you lived such a life. Can you imagine their faces?"

By the end of our conversation we were both laughing but as funny as it might have all sounded when spoken aloud, truly what I expressed are the things I do for Master, for our relationship, for myself.

When the decision was made and Master accepted my slavery and I accepted his ownership we both knew that there were no limits to what Master controlled, to what I gave control over. I serve Master in every way imaginable. And I do so with a great amount of pride and love. Every time I clean the house, granted I do so for me but I do it also for both of us, I feel connected to Master, because I am serving him. I want Master to have a clean, well organised home. I want Master to enjoy returning home from work knowing that the house is well taken care of. Just as each time I hang one of Masters wet t-shirts to dry I do so with a tremendous amount of pleasure knowing Master never has to concern himself about having clean clothes. There is something intimate about picking Master's clothing every morning, laying out his outfit so that when he rises his only thought is to have a good day and to hopefully give me a kiss good morning. All of the little things I do mean a great deal with regards to our exchange. Each time I make dinner for Master, I do so with great thought. I openly admit I am not a good cook. I tend not to enjoy herbs and or spices and so I find it challenging when making food because I simply do not know if it actually tastes good. Since moving in with Master I happily share that I am getting better and I find recipes are wonderful, I follow them to a "T". Whenever I serve Master his dinner I do so with great anticipation hoping with crossed fingers that Master will enjoy the food I prepared. And I dare say when I have pleased Master, when Master finds his meal to be full of flavour and richness I can not help but beam for the rest of the evening. Masters praise and joy for his meal mean a great deal to me, probably because I know Master takes great pleasure when enjoying a well prepared meal.

My service to Master comes in many different ways. Many people who know of my lifestyle are often surprised at just how extensive my servitude to Master is. I know that after sharing with some close friends the many ways I please Master they almost always give the "oh my gosh" expression. For many friends, they truly felt my submission was sexually based. I can not help but wonder how many people think this way and I would have to say, although I have no stats on the fact, that there are possibly numerous relationships between Masters and slaves where the submission, the servitude is generally focused on sexual activity.

Ours is not one of them.

Last night as I fed Master his chocolate delight I felt a closeness, a connection and my entire being felt cocooned and safe. All of those little things, the little ways in which I demonstrate to Master that I am his, that he owns me, controls my every waking moment fill me with a sense of slavery that quite possibly is indescribable.

I am very aware of my slavery and I believe much of that has to do with the many ways in which I serve Master. Granted there are moments when I slip, when I fail to perform in (my) true slave fashion, overall I would say I am extremely aware of what is expected of me, of what is acceptable behaviour and what is not. Some areas I believe I have mastered (no pun intended) such as asking permission to eat dinner with Master. I ask. Consistently. Asking to use the washroom. Absolutely I ask. Every time. I am conditioned with this behaviour so much so that even when Master is not with me, I still ask knowing full well no one is there to answer. One area though that I definitely need to work on is how I express myself when I disagree with Master or when I want something to happen that goes against what Master is suggesting. Just yesterday I encountered what I call "mouth trouble" when I showed Master a pair of knee pads and I stated that perhaps we should purchase some for the young woman so that her knees do not become sore if she is on her knees for any length of time. Master thought it was smart of me to point them out and added that he wanted them because of a particular position he was thinking of putting the young woman in. Now this position is one Master has mentioned before, one I have even thought of being put in myself and because of my interest I investigated how long a person should be in said position. After many hours of research, the results were consistent and suggested that no one person be placed in said position for longer than twenty minutes. Now, if I had simply shared the information I learned with Master, if I had merely made a suggestion that perhaps the knee pads would not be necessary for said position, Master would have taken my words to heart and most likely would have agreed.

Would that not have been awesome if that was how I responded? Yes. It most certainly would have been. Unfortunately, that is not how I responded. Nope, instead I blurted out, "No! Master a person should not be in that position longer than 20 minutes. She does not need the knee pads for that position". When I spoke those words in my mind they did not come across as disrespectful. Thinking about the words after they had been said, typing the words now, I am shocked that Master did not bend me over and paddle my behind right there in aisle 5 of Home Depot. Unfortunately, that verbal outburst was not my first. There have been other times, more times than I wish to admit where I responded to Masters thoughts/ideas with a resounding "no". What bothers me more than actually responding in such a disrespectful manner is that I do not know why I do it. I have no reason to do it. If I have learned anything about Master it is that he is a very reasonable person and any time I have expressed my concerns, Master has taken the time to listen to my point of view and make a decision after hearing what I have to say. This does not mean that Master necessarily agrees with my thoughts or that Master will even do what I suggest but Master will always hear me out and when I respond with such aggression I simply do not allow Master to be open to my thoughts. On the contrary, when I raise my voice as the word "no" tumbles off of my tongue I only push any sense of fairness out of Masters mind which creates a negative exchange between Master and myself.

Although I have been aware of my poor servitude with regards to my defensive rebuttals, I am now actively working towards changing that behaviour. Granted having Master point out my reaction last night was not a pleasant experience I am grateful that he did. I believe it is important to really look inside of myself and to create change within myself. Change that will only benefit me. And luckily benefit mine and Masters relationship.

Just as I make Master his breakfast or clean up after Master has made a new toy, my willingness to be open to Masters' suggestions is simply another way to serve Master. To be Masters slave in every possible way.

And being Masters' slave is something I wish to be, forever.

~His

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