Slavery/submission does not equate to scapegoat.
I do not apologise for my opinions nor do I expect anyone to accept my words as truth. I write for myself. My emotions are just that, mine and although many may not agree I am still entitled to what I feel and I believe the same for everyone else. With that said I must state that due to recent findings of numerous blog threads regarding "sacrificing ones self for her Master" I feel inclined to share my view point here, on my virtual landscape.
I love my Master. I love my mum, my dad, my siblings, my nieces, my nephews, my extended family and my friends. I also love myself. Yes, I will say it again, I love myself and I value who I am and the life I lead. This is not to say that I would not sacrifice my life for those I love, for I believe I would. But by sacrifice I mean I would jump in front of them if a car was swerving to hit any one of them or I would throw myself in front of anyone of them if I heard a gun go off and on and on and on. I am thinking extreme. I am thinking, life-and-death-in-the-heat-of-the-moment-fight-or-flight response" extreme. I would not and I shall repeat, I would not under any circumstance go to jail for any of them or take a parking ticket for any of them or a speeding ticket for any of them or surrendering my license for any of them or pleading guilty to any illegal charge for any of them or confessing to any crime, any activity that I did not do, for any of them!
I am owned. My Master owns me. He loves me, cherishes me, treasures me, confides in me, adores me and I am fortunate and grateful every single day for all he provides, for all he shares, for the relationship we have but there is absolutely no way I am going to surrender myself because of a mistake he has made. This is not to say that I would no longer love him or belong to him or want to be with him should he error because we all do. What it means is I would not take accountability for his actions, that is not my karma journey, it is his.
I have been reading endless blog threads about hypothetical questions regarding "If my Master asked me to ____________, would I be willing to sacrifice myself for him"? In almost all threads there is a comment by the Master in question stating he would not allow his slave to take responsibility for his actions but that he would want her to want to take responsibility, (what a tongue twister). Regardless of whether said Master would not permit such behaviour from his slave, in my opinion it is profoundly absurd that he would even want her to do so in the first place.
My Master wants me to be everything I can possibly be. To attain all goals, all dreams, all wishes and all desires and to strive to be the best person I am and because of this endless support there is no way possible that I would be willing to sacrifice all I have worked for, all that I am because of something Master did. There is a difference between wanting to take away a persons pain and taking on that persons pain for yourself. Should my Master ever error so greatly that he would be physically removed from me, such as prison, of course I would be sad, extremely so. If Masters actions caused him to be physically hurt and I witnessed his pain there is no doubt in my mind that I would want to change places with him so that I could endure his aches and if ever there was a time when Masters emotional well being was pricked I would want to absorb his pain, to remove all the sad feelings he was enduring. I would want for all of three of the above but I know it is not possible to to trade places with people, that what we experience has meaning. I also know my Master would never wish any of his ailments, whether physical or emotional, on me just as I would never wish for any of mine on him.
I do not believe that being Masters slave means I sacrifice my own life freedoms, my own emotions for his or vice versa. For me, being his slave means that at the end of the day I support his choices, love him always, especially during the more challenging of times and work with him through the hurdles in which everyone experiences. My Master would never want me to sacrifice my happiness for his own; oh he would want me to push through difficulties for him, to go outside my box and experience new moments even when they were hard for me but he does not want me sad, he does not want me to give up who I am for him. No, he does not wish to take away, he only wishes to see me grow, to gain, to become anything I have ever wanted and I wish the same for him.
My Master would never ask me to jump off of a cliff unless it was to save my life. My Master would never ask me to commit a crime, to harm another, to go against the very core of who I am and I would never want him to do so either. In our relationship, It is not sacrifice, it is compromise and the two are very, very different.
Just my two cents.
~His
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Monday,March 23,2009 at 8:46 am
Monday,March 23,2009 at 11:00 amcanuck1867
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Goodness. Somebody most definitely has enraged you today. I am pleased to see you hop up on that soap box to proclaim your position as it is important that you stand fast against the mental midgets that walk amongst us. Your point is well taken and will receive no contrary words from me. I agree with you although I must go on record to ask why the question was ever raised in the first place?
I can not speak for the length of time you have been involved in D/s but in my experience it has become evident that there are many varying degrees of thoughts in regard to place and position. I find it laughable that one would ever assume that their slave should or would take the fall for any indiscretions that they themself may have committed. It is more a reflection on the individual that would suggest that they “would never ask but would like to know that they would be willing” to take said fall, well that may be dysfunctional at best.
The feelings you describe when talking of your Master are of a genuine love for him. This is something that you would assume is prevalent in this community but unfortunately is not. There are those who come to this community who carry with them a great deal of emotional baggage that either makes them seek out abuse or choose to dish it out. It is these individuals that need the most nurturing.
The thought that one could lord it over the head of a submissive that at any time they would be expected to assume responsibility for actions not of their own is ludicrous and abusive in nature. Although I do not condone such behavior I am just glad that I do not participate in such activities.
There are more then a few out there that would be first to tell you that what and how you are doing this is wrong. That your love for your Master carries with it a connection that taints your relationship and discredits your dynamic. That you would ever think to openly express yourself in this way is disrespectful to your Master and questions your true submissive self.….I would not say this if I had not read all of this dribble before. You must be true to your Master and yourself and all others can think as they wish.
Although it can be scary sometimes to express your true feelings I applaud you for getting up there and speaking your mind. It does not happen often but I have personally installed handrails on my soapbox so that my little one will not turn an ankle as she gets down in her heels.
Take care and stay true.
Monday,March 23,2009 at 5:12 pmslave
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canuck1867,
My soapbox did take a beating today; however, I was riled with passion and an overwhelming sense of pride in myself and my relationship with my Master. With that said to each his/her own, who am I to dictate what others should believe. My only concern though is the people who take advantage of those who are not strong enough to ensure others do take advantage of them. There are always people who are willing to abuse their power, unfortunately and although I am not here to save anyone, perhaps simply reading another persons point of view will provide inner strength and help so no one is “forced” into something he/she does not desire.
I appreciate your words and am happy to know I am not alone.
~His