I tend to be a serious little bugger. I ponder, perhaps even worry far too much and I take to heart words and concepts that would be best left as just statements rather than testimonials to who I am. Although I do not have any statistical analysis regarding my life up until now, I would have to say, if I did, the data would show that this type of behaviour is not knew to me, in fact it is most likely a very accurate description of who I am.

Well, except for tonight. This evening, much to my surprise, I found myself playing with Master. By playing I do not mean bent over and being whipped or him "using me for pleasure" but rather, being playful. Master had returned home after a not so perfect day and as I drew him a bath and removed myself from his sanctuary to tend to cooking, I found myself feeling giggly. Giggly is generally not an adjective I attribute to myself; however, I very much was giggling while I prepared dinner and when I went upstairs to inform Master that it was time to eat. Much of the evening was blanketed with laughter and I could not help but feel relaxed in Masters presence.

That probably reads odd, it felt slightly awkward to type but the reality is I am not always at ease when I am with Master. This is truly a reflection of myself for I tend to place far too many restrictions and expectations on what I am doing, how I am reacting, what I am saying, feeling, looking like. I confess, it becomes exhausting. Tonight though, none of that existed. I was merely me, enjoying time with Master, not focusing on anything other than his smile, my giggles and the free feeling of not worrying about, well anything.

There was one moment in particular that stands out for me and that is when Master was tickling my cunt. Yes, tickling. He was not petting it or trying to arouse me but rather he was simply running his fingers over the mound and it made me giggle. My laughter was not from shyness, although I am certain there was a hint of that as well, but truly my burst of little squeals came because he was tickling me, my cunt. Such an intimate place to caress, a decadent place to explore and yet, there I was tee heeing and squirming as though he was dancing his fingertips along my sides or across my knees.

I take great joy from that one shared moment, not because it was intimate or that it was a special moment shared with my Master but more because it was the first time that I can remember simply letting go without reservation, without thought or question. I did not fight Master, except in jest as I twisted my body trying to catch my breath from all the laughter, nor did I become withdrawn as I sometimes have in the past. Instead I closed my eyes and embraced the sensations that trickled along my flesh, soaking deep within my pores. This singular event allowed me to open myself to experience; to experience without judgment, without fear of failure.

Our evening together continued in this delighted fashion and throughout it all I felt a closeness to Master that I have not before. Eventually the hours past and it was time to sleep. Master, having to rise early for work, drifted off rather easily; however, here I am, processing all that was exchanged and I can not help but wonder how many times I have missed out on an evening like this all because of my reluctance, my doubt? I would think it might be challenging to play with another when there are so many unnecessary boundaries in place. Luckily, tonight was an eye opening experience for me and a positive one at that for now, now I have experienced that type of wanton joy and with time, I am certain I will want more, need more, crave more and if I am lucky, get more.

~His giggling girl

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