Recently i pos­ted an ad on a local web­site look­ing to meet like minded indi­vidu­als for con­ver­sa­tion. i made it clear i only wanted to meet for con­ver­sa­tion and not sex in any form. Thankfully i did receive e-mails from 10 dif­fer­ent men who appear to be genu­ine, (103 were not). i invited each of the ten men to con­verse with me via msn and dur­ing one of those con­ver­sa­tions i shared that i had this web­site, www.floozy.ca. i have never so ran­domly shared this web­site as it still is some­thing of a nervous mat­ter for me but for some reason i wanted to. (To be respect­ful i will be refer­ring to this gen­tle­man as, Mr. SC.

Mr. SC was kind and politely asked for the address and i wanted to give it to him imme­di­ately but as i sat there, look­ing at the screen, watch­ing as each let­ter was typed i could not believe i was actu­ally about to share mine and Masters’ incred­ibly per­sonal journal. This journal still cre­ates but­ter­flies in my stom­ach. i still become nervous know­ing people in the world read all that Master and i share. i hold noth­ing back in this journal and my shy­ness and yes, embar­rass­ment, still lives deep within my slave core.

i do not think what Master and i do is wrong nor do i believe what W/we share is some­thing to be ashamed of but i have never felt com­fort­able with my sexu­al­ity and know­ing there are people read­ing about it makes me squirm in my seat. And did i squirm when i so eas­ily hit “send” on my com­puter and divulged the web­site to Mr.SC. Once i had given the web­site, i knew Mr.SC was look­ing at it and he only con­firmed when he told me he had read one post but would read more later.

my (Masters) heart was in my (Masters) throat and i imme­di­ately felt the bright flush rise up over my cheeks. i was blush­ing and embar­rassed and yet also proud. i was proud because i was doing exactly what Master has tried so greatly to train me on: shar­ing what is beau­ti­ful and being proud to do so. i am very grate­ful to have given the web­site, even if it was to just one per­son. This is a first, a big big step and i can not wait for more.

Master has a way of turn­ing His slave into a gush­ing gey­ser of wet pleasure.

As a trained slave, Master has ensured His slave is wet the moment i hear His voice; the moment i feel His touch, the moment His pres­ence is felt. Master has trained His slave so well that even the mere thought of Master causes my (His) body to flood and all i want is to serve Master.

Today was no exception.

While speak­ing with Master, i could feel my (His) body begin to leak and so i shared with Master what was hap­pen­ing. i knew Master would be pleased as He finds it very sexy when i leak for Him. Within seconds Master was snap­ping His fin­gers and mak­ing that oh so deli­cious sound of smack­ing. i am not cer­tain as to why but the sound of smack­ing flesh cre­ates fire­works in the core of His cunt. i know it is bizarre to the major­ity but i con­sider myself extremely lucky that so little effort is needed to give me such great pleas­ure. Thankfully, Master feels the same and uses this inform­a­tion to His advant­age; always keep­ing His slave on her toes, (or should i say stand­ing in a puddle).

And i love it!

i love that Master keeps me wet; that Master keeps me in a con­stant state of arousal and bliss­ful con­fu­sion; that Master cre­ates a “high” deep within His slaves’ core and that Master some­times gives me a rush of embar­rass­ment that leaves me want­ing Master to fuck play with His slave for hours upon hours.

This embar­rass­ment is a con­stant source of con­flict for Masters’ slave. When Master places me in a moment of embar­rass­ment, i at first, feel anger towards Master. The anger is not genu­ine rather sim­ilar to the anger of a three year old child when told “no”. At first i squirm, my voice goes up to dog level and i say just one word: “MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAster”! Luckily for me, Master enjoys this demon­stra­tion of emo­tions and i often hear a resound­ing chuckle and even if i can not see His face, in my heart i cer­tainly see His smile.

While speak­ing with Master this after­noon, He brought me to a place of leak­ing euphoria. Master snapped what felt like a hun­dred times, mak­ing me toss and turn, thrust and buck until i could no longer breathe. Master chuckled loudly as He instruc­ted me to fill His slaves’ cunt, plug­ging it so that i could feel the shame from gush­ing as much as i do.

As i have no com­par­ison i am not cer­tain how much girls leak but i am a gey­ser. Masters’ cunt floods con­tinu­ously and as much as Master enjoys this, it embar­rasses me to no end. Master knows of my shame and because of this He used a toy to stop me from nat­ur­ally spill­ing out mak­ing me extremely aware of just how much cunt fluid i leak.

And i was def­in­itely pour­ing with liquid pleas­ure. Masters’ cunt cre­ates so much juice i often have to change my cloth­ing once a day due to the mois­ture left on the fab­ric. But i digress.

As i lay there on my bed, feel­ing every single droplet seep out, Master snapped me into obli­vion then had me pull the toy out only to replace it with two of my fin­gers. i did not want to touch Masters’ cunt because feel­ing my own juices embar­rasses me and He knows that. As He was snap­ping and i was play­ing Master uttered the scar­i­est words to me: that the next time He sees me He will video His drip­ping cunt.

VIDEO!!??

With this _one_ word i became shy, little (Masters words), nervous and yes even more wet than expec­ted. Once more i was in con­flict as Masters’ body respon­ded pos­it­ively yet Masters’ slave mind stumbled in dis­ar­ray. i con­fessed to Master how i was feel­ing and once more i could hear His smile. Master likes me in con­flict and for reas­ons i do not know, i do as well.

The rational side of me _knows_ Master will not video me as He under­stands my shy­ness. Still, i know there are ways to video without show­ing the face or any iden­ti­fi­able marks so that He could video and no one would know it was me. However, as much as i try to ration­al­ise Masters words and choices and as much as i hope deep within my slave core that Master will not video me, the truth is, He may. He may do whatever He pleases, at any time.

And that makes me gush.

Oh the con­stant conflict.